Diva dish

Want to have a bit of fun?

Well, then before going on, jot down your list of the Top 10 divas of all time.

Got it? Now let’s see how your choices compare with the list voted on by readers of Britain’s Gay Spy.

Coming in at No. 10 was the ultimate Jewish Princess, Barbra Streisand. My guess is members of an older generation had the “Funny Girl” ranked a bit higher.

No. 9 was modern dance/bump and grind artist Christina Aguilera, while the Brits voted ear-piercing songstress Kate Bush No. 8.

The Ageless One, Cher, made No. 7 on the list. That’s cool, but I really have to take issue with No. 6—Britney Spears. Please—Britney is to divas what Taco Bell is to Frontera Grill.

No. 5—a surprise but a good one—was Shirley Bassey. The late, great Dusty Springfield came in at No. 4, and No. 3—weird but somehow appropriate—was Sir Elton John.

Finishing at No. 2 was the “Material Girl” herself—Madonna, and No. 1—drum roll, please—none other than Kylie Minogue.

Pretty good except for Britney—how could those Brits vote for the Queen of the Trailer Park and forget Liza and mum Judy Garland? We demand a recount…

Sexy, Sexy

It must be the week for gay polls.

AfterElton.com announced last week the results of their poll of gay men on the sexiest 100 guys on the planet, and there were a few surprises.

For starters, Tom Cruise didn’t make the list. That’s fair enough—being loony definitely affects one’s sexual attractiveness. On the other hand, I’m a bit surprised that Leonardo DiCaprio failed to crack the Top 100, too.

Who did make it to the top? Well, No. 10 was openly gay actor John Barrowman, while another gay actor, T.R. Knight, made No. 8. Sandwiched in between those two (OK—go ahead and picture it) was No. 9 Ryan Phillipe.

No. 7 was Aussie actor Hugh Jackman and No. 6 was Canadian actor Ryan Reynolds. At No. 5 was Taye Diggs, who has a new “Grey’s Anatomy” spinoff coming up, and No. 4 was “Queer As Folk” alum Gale Harold.

No. 3—“Bond, James Bond”—was Daniel Craig and No. 2 was seriously sexy Chris Evans.

No. 1? “Brokeback Mountain” star Jake Gyllenhall took top honors.

OK—now you can start quibbling. (How do these people, for example, rank Gael Garcia Bernal no higher than No. 17?)

Dumb and dumber

Two boneheads who won’t be finishing high on many people’s list are Jamaican dancehall performers Beenie Man and Buju Banton.

Last week they both told Jamaican newspapers that they never signed on to a statement agreeing to renounce homophobic music. The statement, engineered by the British gay groups Outrage and Stop Murder Music, was aimed at stopping some Jamaican performers, Beenie and Banton included, from performing songs encouraging violence against gays. Such songs have been cited as factors in attacks that have resulted in gays being killed in Jamaica.

Boycotts against Beenie, Banton and others, including performance boycotts here in Chicago, have seriously hurt the performers’ bottom lines, and that’s been cited as a factor in convincing them to sign the gay groups’ statement renouncing homophobia.

The problem with their denials is that the gay groups have their actual signatures on the documents, along with supporting statements from their reps.

OK—whatever. If there was any doubt that these people are lying, bigoted cowards, I’d say that doubt is rapidly fading. And don’t we have laws to ban people who encourage violence from entering this country?

Down with sex

Finally, you’ll all be pleased to know that the statement from Samoan sports officials telling gay athletes to “not even think about” having sex with each other has been retracted.

The memo, by Team Samoa management, was released by the Samoa Observer in advance of the opening of the South Pacific Games, which begin Aug. 25 and include athletes from 22 countries.

Speaking of gay and lesbian sex, the memo warned athletes, “Do not embarrass yourself, your family and your country by trying this in the village. Best not to even think about this…”

The chairman of the games’ organizing committee beat a hasty retreat after more than a few complaints.

“We do not have any hard feelings about anybody, whatever you do,” Tapasu Leung Wai told AAP.

Let the games begin…